UNDERDOG of PERFECTION

Captain’s Holiday
Season 3 Episode 19
Original airdate: March 31, 1990

Netflix Synopsis

After mediating a treaty, Capt. Picard is encouraged to take a much needed vacation — yet his efforts to rest are repeatedly interrupted.

My Brief Review

This Netflix synopsis makes the episode sound like a bad sitcom, but once again it only describes the first few minutes.

Immediately upon his arrival on Bikini Planet, Picard bumps into a woman, who promptly kisses him, to elude a Ferengi who’s after her. We know immediately that she’s going to be trouble for Picard, and before long we’re on a quest for a McGuffin from the future.

The setting on Risa, a mysterious woman, and time travel all give this episode a strong feeling of Star Trek: Enterprise to me, which of course came a decade after TNG, but having watched it more recently, it’s fresher in my mind.

This episode is… pretty good, if only for one reason. Picard punches a Ferengi in the face.

The whole time travel thing is a bit problematic, and my initial reaction to why it’s problematic actually gets addressed near the end of the episode, but in a way that doesn’t really make any sense.

Memorable Moment

Picard punches a Ferengi in the face.

Crew Rando

Even though this episode takes place almost entirely off the Enterprise, with no one from the crew except Picard, we actually have a named rando! At the very beginning of the episode, Ensign Bennett is at the helm, for unexplained reasons (probably just that Wil Wheaton, whose presence in this season was intermittent anyway, couldn’t be bothered to be on set for one brief scene), and Picard addresses him, by name.

Distance Rating: 3K

IMDb score: 7.3/10

Allegiance
Season 3 Episode 18
Original airdate: March 24, 1990

Netflix Synopsis

Capt. Picard is kidnapped and held with three different aliens, while an impostor takes his place aboard the Enterprise.

My Brief Review

At first I was inclined to skip this episode; for some reason the synopsis didn’t appeal to me. But I’m glad I didn’t, because this is another classic episode that I remember well from the original airing.

Picard and three other species are imprisoned in a strange room. They are four archetypes, and their differences create conflict as they try to find an escape. This part of the story has a very strong Twilight Zone vibe for me, specifically the legendary episode “Five Characters in Search of an Exit.” If this were the entire story it would be a great episode, but there’s another half…

The real Picard has been replaced with an exact replica. Well… almost an exact replica. He has Picard’s knowledge, but his behavior is… well, just a bit off. In ways that at first merely confuse but ultimately nearly kill the entire crew.

Will Riker orchestrate a mutiny to save the Enterprise? You’ll have to watch to find out. I’ll just say it was a weird feeling to watch this episode literally at the very hour that the House of Representatives is debating the second impeachment of Donald Trump.

Memorable Moment

There are plenty of memorable moments in this episode, but definitely the most lasting image for me is of Picard first discovering the “food” being offered in the prison… basically a red translucent hockey puck.

Crew Rando

I found myself strangely aware of all of the random people just roaming the halls on the Enterprise in this episode. In particular, I found it odd that so many people would just be passing by the quarters of whichever officer hosts the poker games. But guess what… “backflip master” Crewman Martinez once again makes an appearance, apparently… I still haven’t actually figured out who he is.

Distance Rating: 4K

IMDb score: a shockingly low 7.5/10

Sins of the Father
Season 3 Episode 17
Original airdate: March 17, 1990

Netflix Synopsis

A Klingon commander boards the Enterprise in an officer exchange program initiated by Starfleet, much to the chagrin of the crew.

My Brief Review

Uh… wow. Whoever wrote that synopsis (which is identical on IMDb) clearly only watched the first few minutes of this episode, as “the chagrin of the crew” is only relevant for the first couple of scenes.

This is a classic episode, and one of the first in which we really get a glimpse of the Klingon empire. That Klingon commander who comes aboard is really Worf’s brother Kurn, come to find Worf to go to the High Council and challenge the posthumous ruling that has labeled their father a traitor and brought dishonor to the family.

This all, of course, is a cover-up, and Worf along with his “cha’DIch” (Captain Picard) means to get to the bottom of it!

This is the beginning of a story that will come back in future episodes.

Memorable Moment

Picard, in his cha’DIch duties, seeks out the old woman Kahlest, who was Worf’s nurse and was believed to be dead, but has in fact been in hiding. After failing to convince her to testify on Worf’s behalf, Picard is jumped by three Klingons and holds his own… until he doesn’t. Kahlest stabs one of them to save Picard, and agrees to testify.

Crew Rando

“Transporter Technician” — who manages to get a credit, while the ever-present Crewmen Nelson and Martinez once again do not!

Distance Rating: 6K

IMDb score: 8.2/10

I didn’t have time to write my review after finishing Yesterday’s Enterprise… uh… yesterday, so I’m combining both… uh… yesterday’s review and today’s into one here. If you’re looking closely, you may notice also that I’ve skipped S3E14, A Matter of Perspective. I haven’t been skipping many episodes in season 3, but this synopsis was just too much for me: “The widow of respected scientist Dr. Nel Apgar accuses Riker of seducing her and killing her husband.”

#28

Yesterday’s Enterprise
Season 3 Episode 15
Original airdate: February 17, 1990

Netflix Synopsis

When the long-lost Enterprise C enters the Enterprise D’s time and space continuum, an alternate history places the crew at war with the Klingons.

My Brief Review

Oh yes! I love episodes involving time travel and alternate timelines. This one is most excellent, right from the disorienting beginning — even after having read this synopsis. Enterprise encounters a strange space anomaly, and when a Federation starship emerges from it, we see a very different looking bridge, with Picard and the rest of the crew in their usual spots… except Worf is gone and Tasha Yar is back at her comms post.

Curious. Immediately we assume the arriving ship is coming from an alternate timeline. But soon we realize that we haven’t cut to the other ship — that ship’s appearance through the anomaly has radically transformed “our” Enterprise.

That other ship is the Enterprise C, predecessor of Picard’s Enterprise, having traveled forward 22 years, which also changed history to the extent that the Federation and Klingons have been at war for over two decades, and things are not looking good.

I won’t spoil any more details, since I think this one is worth seeing. (Don’t let my distance rating fool you… I just wasn’t up for much of a run yesterday. This is a great episode.)

Memorable Moment

Say no more, but it’s when Guinan first sees Tasha Yar.

Crew Rando

There are plenty of randos in this one, but I need to focus on Lt. Richard Castillo, a bridge officer from the Enterprise C, played by none other than Christopher “I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast” McDonald. (I’m sure he’s known for many things but, for better or worse, I’ll always remember him as the rival in Happy Gilmore.)

Distance Rating: 4K

IMDb score: 9.2/10

#29

The Offspring
Season 3 Episode 16
Original airdate: March 10, 1990

Netflix Synopsis

Hoping to further his creator’s work and perpetuate his species, Data creates an android named Lal.

My Brief Review

This is one of the most memorable episodes, for me, from 30 years ago. Not necessarily because it’s one of the best episodes, although it’s good, but mostly because it’s just… well, memorable.

Data creates an android daughter named Lal. She learns quickly, and soon begins to use contractions — something Data, incomprehensibly, is incapable of — and eventually, when threatened with separation from Data by a villainous admiral who wants to take her away to develop in a controlled environment, she learns to feel emotion. Unfortunately, that emotion is fear, and it short-circuits her positronic brain, killing her. Not without the villainous admiral trying to help Data save her first, and not without a goodbye moment with Data that is sure to trigger an emotional response in all but the most hardened androids and villainous admirals watching.

Two big problems with this episode: First, it’s a bit hard to take seriously in 2021, given that our century’s development in artificial intelligence have already made Lal — and Data — seem ludicrously simplistic in some ways, while in others they are still highly improbable. (Much like the replicator and transporter technologies the show relies on so much.) And second, while the story of Lal developing emotion and it destroying her is engaging and tragic, it’s also hard to overlook the fact that the only reason she had that extreme response was because the admiral was trying to take her away. So it’s hard to be too convinced by his emotional recounting of the situation to Troi and Riker. He never acknowledges that, despite is efforts to save Lal, it’s still his fault she died.

One more thing. A moment early on, that feels… well, just awkward I guess, watching in 2021, is the scene before Lal has chosen her gender and species. Her conversation with Data and Troi is simultaneously rather progressive in that they discuss how Lal gets to choose a gender identity, and dated in its complete lack of awareness of non-binary and gender nonconforming identities. This is always a problem with Star Trek… it’s set hundreds of years in the future, but many things about it become dated within a few decades.

Memorable Moment

Lal, working in Ten-Forward with Guinan so she has an opportunity to observe human behavior, sees a couple flirting in the corner, and when they kiss, yells out, “HE’S BITING THAT FEMALE!”

Crew Rando

Whoever was sitting at Data’s station before he came to the bridge right at the end. shrug

Distance Rating: 3K

IMDb score: 8.5/10