The vocals just aren’t there, dawg! (For that matter, neither is anything else)

Randy and PaulaYikes. I just opened up the iTunes Store and was confronted with the new Randy Jackson and Paula Abdul single, “Dance Like There’s No Tomorrow.” Yeah, that’s just what the world needed. Actually, it’s pretty instructive for American Idol contestants in terms of not taking Paula’s (or Randy’s, for that matter) opinion too seriously. Paula’s voice is so pitch-corrected that she sounds like one of the text-to-speech automatons built into Mac OS X. And the arrangement and production are so blandly unoriginal that… well… honestly, it’s hard to even describe them because, how do you describe “nothing”?

Let’s just hope Simon Cowell didn’t have anything to do with this.